A Full Circle Moment

On The Road Again

In 2005, I wouldn't believe you if you told me that I would move back to my hometown 20 years later. I was an ambitious teenager who had her whole life planned out and if anyone tried to tell me otherwise, I wasn't hearing it. I initially wanted to move to California for college, but my family said it wasn’t a hop, jump and skip away. So, I had to choose another place, but I knew I wasn’t staying in Chicago.

I must admit Chicago is a beautiful city full of awe-inspiring skyscrapers, yummy delicious food and we can’t forget about the majesty of Lake Michigan. Yet, it wasn’t enough to make me want to stay there for college.

Honestly, I had to leave because of my childhood trauma; I couldn’t take the experiences I dealt with since I was in utero any longer and it was time for me to fly my wings far, far away from this place.

I ended up choosing Georgia State University in Downtown Atlanta and I began to spread my wings. Of course, I’ve visited “home” throughout the years. Yet every time someone asked me “When are you coming back home?”, I cringed and gave a disapproving response.

Our bodies carry every experience we’ve had whether we know it or not. So me thinking about living in Chicago again, gave me the Heebie-jeebies. I couldn’t get fully comfortable there and it brought up so many memories I tried to forget about completely. But life has a way of bringing us back to the things we need to tend to that we thought were long gone.

I truly believe that every step of our journey prepares us for the next one and I had no choice, but to surrender to the flow of life. I had to address my mother and father wounds. I had to love and nurture myself and I had to move on with my life holding firm to boundaries I knew nothing of as a child.

As I drove through Downtown Chicago following my husband in the U-Haul, my soul told me “You’re safe here.”

I say all this to say that we don’t know the windy roads we may travel during this life, but be open to the unknown and embrace it with open arms even if the unknownness is your old stumping ground. The truth is that it is unknown because you’re coming there as a new person with new insight.

Your presence on these pages is deeply appreciated.